just a blog

But I've never felt more stupid and incompetent in my life.

Tomorrow.

The war begins.

Saw that the very very very very very hawt ah lian was in the library again.

I wonder if she noticed that I've been bio-ing her. But no lah, being the very very skilled peeker I am, I know I haven't been obvious.

She and her friends were inside this discussion room and me and Dragon were sitting outside. Dragon went to fill water leaving me alone at the table.

Then the ah lian got out of the discussion room.

To come and sit right opposite me.

It scared the utter daylights out of my poor soul. I sat there like a pathetic little boy staring so hard at my notes I swear I thought they were going to catch fire. Did not dare to look up at all.

Why I so hum ji?!

Discussion room is such a comfy place to be in. Come out for what? Somemore got many so seats why come and sit opposite me?!

Indicator of interest?!

Okay maybe I'm cheating myself. Maybe she's just showing her ah lian colours and just wanted to scare me.

But actually I think she's a very nice person despite her super chao ah lian facade lah.

Like me lo, look very dao and mean, but actually I have hot blood boiling inside okay!

Muahahahahaha.

Maybe we're alike.

Maybe some day we'd really come to know each other.

Maybe.

Just maybe ;)

"Hi, excuse me, do you mind taking care of our stuff for us?"

*Looks up*

*Electrified*

"Yeah erm sure. But er I'm leaving soon, you guys be long?"

"Nah, just going for a puff"

HootZ!

Smoker sia.

And she's DAMN DAMN HAWT.

But really very ah lian.

If during my AES days, someone actually came to tell me that one day I'll be frickin' camping in NUS to study through the night, I would say he's crazy.

I haven't slept in the last 24 hours.

It's bedtime.

Balakam!

I was sitting through the last Fluid Mechanics lecture and observing how enthusiastic my peers were, scribbling notes, asking each other questions, nodding to themselves in understanding.

The less action baby ones were listening intently, brows crossed, eyes fixated in front.

And what was I doing? Trying to appreciate what was being taught, pencil in hands, paper ready, blindly copying what was being shown on the transparency.

And deep down inside, I just wished the lecture would end immediately.

I don't enjoy my modules. Now, I know most of my peers won't actually like the modules either, but I really really can't put my heart into being a good engineering student.

I've tried.

I stay in school till the library closes almost every day since I don't know when, to force myself to study, to force myself to like my modules.

Try as I may, I simply don't give a damn why Reynold's number being more than or less than 2300 makes it turbulent or laminar and the properties of water in those states.

Like2smell always likes to scream at me...

"Where's your passion?!"

I guess I can only say it's not in engineering. I'm study with brute force, sheer brainpower, of which I don't have much, to make things worse.

I read business books for leisure. My languages are alright. I'd probably be happier in Arts or in Business.

In part due to babes of course, but I digress.

My friends have also commented more than once.

"I really don't know why you chose Engin."

And now, nearing examinations, the effects of that not-very-wise choice is very much magnified. And it's too late for anything to be done about it anyway.

So I'm just grumbling.

Still, at the end of it all, I just can't help but reflect upon this question again and again.

"Wtf am I doing in Engin?"

*At CBLC being kan chiong trying to catch up on last minute revision before quiz*

Flower appears. Shades. Hippy wear. Tube.

And another. Jeans. Jacket. Decent type.

*Goes for lunch*

*Spots the lead from Hero for a Day Part One from afar!!*

*Sibeh excited*

*Sits down near her table*

And realizes both the flowers in the morning eating at the same table as her.

*Q-ing at where else but 'The Land of Many Many Flowers", the Arts Canteen*

*Flower 1 ahead*

*Flower 2 comes from behind me*

*Flower 1 and Flower 2 start chatting happily with poor Kang Kang stuck in the middle*

*Kang Kang courteously smiles to Flower 2 behind and offers her his place so that the two Flowers can chat in peace*

*Flower 2 acts demure and acts embarrassed and talks very not-softly to Flower 1 "ni kan lah!!!! nong wo paiseh..."*

*Kang Kang is amused*

*Spots Flower 3 hovering in front of the stall, trying to peek to see what's inside. Is again amused by the kind of organisms that breed on this side of NUS*

It is Kang Kang's turn.

"Auntie, waffle liang3 ge4, yi ge peanut, yi ge gosong!!"

*Flower three looks damn stunned and turns toward Kang Kang in amazement*

*Kang Kang is scared and wonders what in the world is going on*

"Errm.. Hello, excuse me, you ordered waffles? What other flavours are there ah?"

Ah ha, she was impressed by my profound knowledge of waffles!

*Kang Kang puffs up his nearly non-existent chest and confidently replies*

"Got chocolate, peanut and jam!"

"Wah.............. How you know?!"

*Kang Kang is taken aback*

*Wanted to say "I thought everybody know?!" but one must never treat flowers rudely*

"Ermm... There, can see mah"

*Points inside the stall*

"Where? Where? Got meh? Tip-toes and hops and tries damn hard to look into the stall and in the process, leans too close to Kang Kang for comfort*

Not that I mind though.

Bwahahahahahahaha.

*Tries to help*

"Ermm.. There, see? The containers there... That one is jam, that one is peanut, that one is chocolate..."

"Oh okay! Thank you!"

*Skips happily all the way to the back to join the queue*

Arts is such a different place.

My friend is a star!

A jue dui super star!

Okay lah Jeremy is in the top 24 for now and how much he progresses after this doesn't matter that much anymore lah, since being in top 24 is very good already!

SwallowStrike says we should have taken compromising pictures of him during CTW last time so that we can blackmail him when he becomes rich and famous some day muahaha.

Featuring...

Hossan Leong!

I was checking out Nation Building stuff at CBLC when I saw the very very very very very cute girl again!

I was so xing fen, but I hope she didn't see me, because if she did then that must mean she doesn't recognize me anymore :(

Japanese lehhhhhhhh!!!

I very promptly smsed bm about the latest sighting of her potential biao sao, and recieved a slightly uncouth reply.

"Don't hum ji! Ask for her number!"

Aye, my dear bm is not very gentle is she.

Alas, her bg is really quite hum ji, and has never, and probably, will never, dare to ask a char bor for number one. Will I really remain single for the rest of my life?!

*Face in palms*

And I digress.

Tomorrow.

If the very very very very very cute girl comes to ask for help when I'm on duty again tomorrow, I SHALL STRIKE.

Erm...

I'll try lah.

After bball yesterday, the engineers decided very impromptu-ly and spontaneously to camp in school overnight to study and be ultra-dilligent!

With hot blood in da bodies, filled with noble plans to double our CAP this semester, heart pumping with endless motivation to work extremely hard for the rest of the night, we...

Erm...

Proceeded to Munchie Monkey and sat there talking kok and drinking beer for two hours.

Sibeh jia lat. We're damn talented slackers. Such flair.

Overwhelmed with guilt, hastily proceeded to YIH study room to study, fortunately without much distraction, until 2 a.m!

And then like2smell comes to me and says "balakam!" and I thought they were going to sleep in YIH. Then I realized they were going to Engin Block to sleep instead, which meant that I had been left alone in YIH, and I had to walk over to Engin alone in the middle of the night.

Then tmd, sleep halfway polevaulter2 kena bite by mosquito cannot sleep, then we had to frickin' walk back to YIH. Luckily got PUI shou liu us in CSC clubroom.

Alas, there were not enough sofas and sleeping bag, and being the kind soul I am, I slept on the chair. Couldn't sleep cos my neck was breaking. So I went to lie on the hard floor.

Torturous.

So right now I'm left feeling sibeh lethargic and last night was more like an adventure than a studious night.

I miss home.

Happy birthday, auditor ting ;)

I helped a super duper kawaii japanese exchange student during CBLC duty today. And she was so grateful!

Wah lauz, it's really this kinda experiences that makes CBLC duty worth doing, muahahaha!

She's really damn damn cute.

I SHOULD have asked for her number.

DAMN.

"The truly creative mind in any field is no more than this: A human creature born abnormally, inhumanly sensitive. To him.. A touch is a blow, a sound is a noise, a misfortune is a tragedy, a joy is an ecstacy, a friend is a lover, a lover is a god, and failure is death. Add to this cruelly delicate organism the overpowering necessity to create, create, create -- so that without the creating of music or poetry or books or buildings or something of meaning, his very breath is cut off from him. He must create, must pour out creation. By some strange unknown, inward urgency he is not really alive unless he is creating."

-Pearl S, Buck, novelist, Nobel Laureate (1892-1973)

I'm a sucker for tragedies.

There was a blind girl who hated herself
because she's blind.
She hated everyone, except her loving boyfriend.
He's always there for her.

She said that if she could only see the world, she
would marry her boyfriend.
One day, someone donated a pair of eyes to her and
then she can see everything, including her boyfriend.

Her boyfriend asked her, "Now that you can see the
world, will you marry me?" The girl was shocked when she saw that her
boyfriend is blind, and refused to marry him.

He walked away in tears, and later wrote
a letter to her saying.  "Just take care of my eyes, my dear."